Dealing with kids, by Dr. Ogi Ressel

Friday, June 19th 2009

Warm hellos to everyone!

I've been a bit heavy-handed in the past few THOTS, so let's lighten
things up a bit!

Many doctors are totally lost when it comes to the issue of handling
children in the office: "Dr. Ogi, what do I do with these little people?

They scare the crap out of me." Relax! It's easy! You need to think like
a kid. Here is where men definitely have the advantage - most never really
grow up. I remember my wife often yelling at me: "Ogi, grow up!"
See...I think it is just part of being a guy!

I think all the wives and girlfriends out there will agree with me on this point.
We're all kids - it's just that the toys cost a bit more now!

So you're a little nervous seeing kids. So what?

I mean, that's what anti-perspirant is all about, isn't it? So what if your shirt
is soaked inside - everyone gets nervous at times, but why now? It's only a child!

I mean, here you are, a grown up, with a college education and a degree,
and you feel totally intimidated by this very short and cute 7 year old girl in
front of you.
To make matters worse, she asks straight out; "Why are you sweating?"

Here is where you, a rationally thinking, well adjusted adult - one who has spent
years studying the art and science and philosophy of Chiropractic - start to
babble defensively.

Have I missed anything?

This seems to be a common scenario for many a doctor who is not accustomed
to seeing children.

Relax.
It gets better the more children you see - like anything else!
That is why they call it practice.

The idea of having kids behaving in your office AND actually enjoying the
experience of seeing them (and you also) is rooted in the fact that you need
to play with the kids. I don't mean you need to play on your carpet with games
and toys and blocks. No. You need to play and make the whole visit "thing"
a game. Let me give you some examples of what I used to do:

Walking beside a 5 year old, I would often ask: "Why are you so short?

Have you been this short for long?" The child would beam up a smile, giggle,
and say, "I'm little, silly." I made a friend.

And of course there is nothing wrong with threatening kids playfully:

"I'll rip out your liver." Or, "I'll tear off your kneecaps...if you don't behave."
And of course you say this with mock seriousness. Parents will look at you horrified,
but the kids will tease you and laugh and want you to go on!

For the child who is a bit older and you are examining his mom and you know
that if he gets bored he'll be in orbit around your office, you may want to give
him a task: "Bobby, I am going to put you on a mission. I want you to go to
the children's house in the reception area and I want you to test all the toys
to see which ones are not working. AND, I want you to draw and color all the
toys that are NOT working. OK? Go!" Now you have peace and quiet with mom
for 10-20 minutes.

Now....If the children are little, they won't feel comfortable leaving their mom
while she is being examined: If they are boisterous, I'll tell them this: "I want
you to sit down on the floor, your backs to the door, and fingers on lips. And if I
ever see your finger off your lips, there will be serious consequences - I'll feed
you to my pet frog, I'll remove your toes, I'll make you eat liver." The kids giggle,
laugh, and have fun. BUT...they listen to me. And many moms ask me: "Dr. Ogi,
do you give classes on this? You are so good with my kids. ....and they listen to you."

Yes...it's fear!

You can also have a sign in your office:
To all parents:
if your children are misbehaving, they will be given an espresso and a free puppy."

All parents will appreciate being told in a humorous and pleasant manner
that they are in charge of their children while in your office and that your
CAs do not babysit. Trust me....your staff will thank you.

Insanity is hereditary: You get it from your kids

Another sign:
This one says it all - parents will totally get your message!

Ok....So what do you with these very short people while you are adjusting them? Easy.

I would tell the kids this: "Trevor, when I adjust you, I want you to hang onto your
belly button with both hands. (the child is on his back) This is because sometimes
it jumps off and I don't want to look for it.

Last week we had a little girl who didn't listen to me and we're still looking for
her belly button. Ok?"
Right...Trevor has both hands on his belly button!

And of course you can really ham it up with kids: When I have a 7 year old girl in
the exam room with her mom, I love to ask this question:
"So...tell me this: How many boyfriends do you have?" The responses are awesome
and all moms pay close attention to the answers. The look on their faces says it all!

You are also welcome to get in touch with Dr. Jeanne Ohm who has a wonderful
kids learning program that she devised. It is awesome - Power On. I've used it for
years. E-mail her at: ohmdc@comcast.net

Ok...this short THOT will give you a few ideas on how to deal with children.
Make it a game. Have fun. The important thing is not to show fear - they will sense
it and then you've had it. They will tell you to sit by the door with fingers on your lips!

Warmest wishes.
Dr. Ogi Ressel